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Today's Children Are Too Fearless And Possibly Mentally Unstable

Nobody

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Virginia Beach, VA
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Very proud of my son today, but also worried. My daughter is 10, and my son is 5. There are a lot of kids in the neighborhood here that range in age from 3-16. Usually, the whole group plays together out in our cul de sac with no issues. But recently, this family moved in a few doors down with a son who's an antagonizing and instigating little pain in the ass. He is constantly getting the kids to play rougher and rougher to the point someone always gets hurt and cries. Lately, he's been getting worse, like trying to get the younger kids to hurt each other. I actually think he gets off on it.

This kid has no father, and is living with his mom and grandma. He's 15 years old, and I would be willing to bet a felon in the very near future, the kid is a total sociopath. In the few weeks he's lived here, he has put rocks through windows, threatened to kill his mom, and hit the principal. His mom and grandma don't do a damn thing when someone complains and write it off as kids being kids

Today, all the kids were outside playing football like they always do. I was working on the mower in the garage and my son was helping me. I started hearing a lot of commotion a little further up the street and turned to see what it was, and it looked like a brawl. Then I heard my daughter screaming and crying for help. Apparently this older kid had talked a group of the 12-15 year olds into just beating up the the younger kids, all of which are 6-10 years old. It was 7 older kids, and 4 smaller ones. One of the boys pushed my daughter off of her bike and was dragging her across the street as she was yelling and crying. I was on my back at the time, so while I was trying to hobble my way to my feet as quick as I could, my son took off down there and just started to roundhouse kids left and right.

So I'm hobbling down the street yelling to try to break it all up, and while my son is punching one kid in the side of the head, the kid's friend pulls my son off of him by his neck and throws him into the yard. It was like I was going in super slow motion and they were getting further away every step I took. My son hopped back up as my daughter was trying to get away and got tackled by another boy, and my son chased down the boy and started to pulverize this kid's face relentlessly until he let go of my daughter.

When I got there and tried to pull my son off the kid, he was just mercilessly beating this kid's head in like he was trying to kill him, and he was completely enraged like I have never seen in any child before. Even when I got him off the kid, he was swinging his hands and feet wildly to get to him again. As I was carrying my son home and walking with my daughter, these kids were talking **** to me saying, "you can't do **** bitch, we're kids, **** you."

What the hell has happened to kids these days? When I was a kid, a parent coming out made you run, now they talk ****. So I told the older kid that threw my son into the yard I was gonna follow him home and beat the **** out of his dad and let him explain why. He left, but the others started in until I told them I was gonna let my son continue at it if they didn't leave. They slowly but surely left within a few minutes, talking **** the whole time. As if that isn't bad enough, why would any teenager beat the crap out of little kids for fun? It's truly sickening to think about.

I still don't know what started it all, and a bunch of neighbors were telling me to call the cops since in VA the parents can be arrested for the actions of their child, but I don't see why someone should go to jail because their kids suck. That, and I think being a teenager and almost getting put in the hospital by a 5 year old is embarrassing enough. One thing is for sure though, if it happens again, some parents will be opening their door to an ass beating. The problem with these kids is definitely their parents though. Over the past year or so, every time one of them does something messed up, and someone over here tells the parents, they brush it off like it's no big deal.

One example is the animal killing. We have dozens of ducks in the neighborhood at any given time. When they have babies, it's usually 10-15 at a time, and the kids around here love them and feed them all the time. These older kids come from the neighborhood one street up the road, and their big thrill is to see how many of the babies they can chase down and stomp to death. We're talking future serial killers here. They've been reported a lot of times for it, but nothing is ever done to stop it. Then they constantly vandalize things and get ratted out by other kids, but the police always say if we can't prove it, then it didn't happen. Apparently 5-10 kids witnessing it doesn't matter for anything.

Anyway, one thing that's still eating at me is how my son responded. I am extremely glad that he was so quick and eager to react to help out his big sister, but he doesn't seem to realize that these kids are a lot bigger than he is. He is really tough for his age, almost freakishly so, but he can't keep thinking that just because he's put 3 bigger kids on their ass with little effort in the last few months that it will always be like that. Not only that, the rage he had kinda worries me. I am almost certain it was a reaction to seeing his sister being attacked, but there is no way to be sure about it. When I was 8, a kid in our neighborhood chased after my sister with a bat and hit her in the head with it and knocked her out because he thought she was the girl who just beat his sister up. This kid was 14 and my sister was 10. I thought she was dead, so I literally tried to beat the kid to death with my fists until his brother choked me out to get me off of him. So I know from experience that you can snap in a situation like that to protect family, I just hope it was a reaction to the situation and not something more.

He is pretty undersized for his age, but the kid is brutal and fearless when he gets picked on and doesn't let anybody of any size get away with anything just because he's small. For anyone who has had to deal with a son that can get too physical, is there any way to help him control it? He never watches wrestling, boxing, MMA, etc. and doesn't get it from movies or behavior in our home, so I don't even know where he learned the things he can do. The craziest part is, he is normally the sweetest and most harmless kid in the world, and is friends with everyone. Also, when it's a kid his age acting too rough, he just goes with the flow or walks away and it's a non issue. It's just something about these bigger kids messing with him or his sister that really sets him off and makes him lose it. I just worry that it might escalate, because I don't know if it's just his defense mechanism or what.

Any advice?
 
We had a little smart ass like that move into the neighborhod last year in a rental house. Same kind of thing , just not as violent as the situation you have. All the kids got along nicely until Little Johnny ****head showed up.

I was nice about it at first, talked to the kid. Then talked to his Mom. Nada. Same kind of thing happened to my daughter (who is small for her age) as happend to yours. One last time I tried to talk to the Mom, who seemingly cared less.

So one day I called Little Johnny ****head into my yard. He had the same attitude as your little **** "You can't touch me".

So I invite him into my house and showed him my war room. I have photos of me in the desert, in Iraq and Afghanistan and various other places. I have antique military guns hanging on the walls, along with other war mementos as well as a Samurai sword, Ghurka knife and an M-1 bayonet.

He seemed especially impressed with the picture of me eating lunch on a rock with a taliban head at my feet

And then I explained how the world works. I explained what Post Tramatic Stress Syndrome is and how it can result in sudden, unintentional actions and consequences, and how it's usually aggravated by high strung events and noises. I explained to him (While showing him a picture on the wall of me in my combat controller garb standing by the 30mm nose cannon of an A-10) how I helped vaporize people in far away lands, and that I really wouldn't mind adding one more **** to the tally, especially if I saw my daughter crying again because of something he did. I explained that my daughter crying aggravates my aforementioned PTSD, and that according to my VA records I really can't be held responsible for my actions. OK, the last part was a bit of exxageration, but it seemed to have worked and seems to have gotten his attention.

After that, my kids didn't have any issues with Little Johnny ****head and soon thereafter Little Johnny ****heads Mom got kicked out of the house for not paying the rent, so all is normal again.

Personally, I wouldn't be too concerned over your son's reaction. I'm sure seeing his sister get pummeled enraged him, and if he's small for his size he may need that extra edge anyway.

Sorry I can't let your little **** see the war room, but maybe a little witness-less talk to the ****head would do some good
 
That story was awesome :laugh:

I thought about having a little heart to heart with the prick honestly, but he's the type that would try to say he was raped or some ****.

I think it will pass in due time though. The whole family is hoodrats, and the place they are in is $1,200 a month. Only the mother works, and she can't even afford a car. I really don't see how she's affording the place to begin with. I figure soon enough they'll be evicted and the peace will resume.

I also find it odd that toys started vanishing when this kid moved in too. It used to be one of those neighborhoods where the kids left their toys and bikes out and nobody messed with them. Then he moves in, and everyone has to bring in their stuff or it disappears.

The thing I don't get is that there are bigger hoodrats in the neighborhood than him, but they respect the little kids and don't mess with their **** or them. This kid is just a dick. I'm thinking about having a talk with one of the older hoodrats and introducing them to this kid and let him know the pecking order around here :)
 
is this really new? i mean, seriously. there have been bullies and ****head kids since the beginning of time. you cant change it and you wont be able to stop it. just deal with the fact that this is how it is and prepare your kids.
This was my line of thinking. My wife was just pissed that I sat the kids down and gave them full permission to unload on any kid that hurts or attempts to hurt them. I was undersized growing up, just like my son is. But he is solid as hell just like I have always been. I had to learn to fight or I had to take ass beatings from kids. I would much rather be the winner, so fighting quickly became the first thing I was extremely good at. One advantage my son has is an iron jaw and no fear, I was never scared, but I admit I have a glass jaw. Thats why I always go for shock and awe lol. I seriously doubt parents will be banging down the door to tell me my kindergartnrt beat their middle schoolers ass, so I doubt it will be an issue. I just have to find a way to make sure he does it in defense only and not out of aggression.
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That is very true for the most part though Mike. My wife is typically very understanding that certain situations call for an escalation of physicality though, she just freaks out when it involves the kids.

Our daughter is extremely popular amongst the students and teachers at her school. She is also brilliant and excels at school and is very involved in after school activities. She is in the chess club, she is a member of the safety patrol, she plays the cello, and she is part of an independent running club. She loves doing all of these things, so we support her fully. But kids are dicks, and it makes her a target for bullies, because she does the things they typically don't consider "cool: to their standards, so she gets picked on.

Since she is so popular and liked by the staff and most of the students, she is also seen by a lot of bullies as a brown noser/teacher's pet, so she has to deal with that. When you add in the fact that she has Asperger's, it makes any type of rejection or non acceptance really tear her up.

Her little brother adores her though. Whenever she's upset, he makes her feel better, and he has always stood up for her, even though she's 5 years older than he is. He is very laid back, but he is borderline violent when he or his sister get picked on, he absolutely doesn't take any **** from anybody. As a result, she rarely gets messed with when he's around, because he jumps in head first and goes off on people and sorts out the mess after the fact. I have no problem with that, but my wife is overly fearful because of his size. The thing is, he's been in only 5 fights in his life, and has manhandled the bully every time, and they were all 5-7 years older than him. I praise him for it, because I hate people who pick on someone just because, but my wife keeps trying to undo the praise by telling him to take the talk your way out approach, because that's what she was taught.

I was always taught that you defend yourself and your family no matter what, even if you hate each other, and it's worked out just fine for me. Years ago, me and my sister hadn't talked for 2 years, because we just never got along and clashed a lot. But she was dating an asshole that became increasingly more abusive, and it peaked when she was bedridden recovering from surgery, and he decided to lock her in her room without food or her medicine, just because they had an argument. He did this knowing she couldn't get out of bed.She had him arrested for it, and he got out that same night, and he threatened her some more for having him arrested. So I got in my car and drove to their house when my sister called me and asked me to come make sure he didn't hurt her. When I got there, he was pulling her to the ground by her hair, so I smacked his head into the floor, pulled him down the stairs, and took him outside and beat the **** out of him. She hasn't heard from him since, and it oddly brought me and her closer together, and we're good friends now.

I know from being in that situation, that it enrages you to see someone hurting your sibling. I don't stand for it, and I don't see why I should tell my son to let her fight her own battles. He's not aggressive any other time, and he's never beat on someone that didn't deserve it, so I don't see the problem.
 
Do you find it at all ironic that you say the other kid's parents are the problem in one sentence, and then in the next you tell them you're going to their houses to beat up their dads? Just curious...
 
Do you find it at all ironic that you say the other kid's parents are the problem in one sentence, and then in the next you tell them you're going to their houses to beat up their dads? Just curious...
That's not ironic at all. Their kids are bullies, because they are failures as parents. I am very active in every aspect of the lives of my children. The fact they are both excessively ahead of the curve in school, and my daughter is heavily involved in after school and group activities speaks to that. I'm not raising future felons and serial killers.

I don't see how me threatening to knock sense into their idiot parents is ironic in any way. If anything, it's informative. Who knows, maybe getting their asses handed to them is what some of these parents need to actually be parents.
 
I just have to find a way to make sure he does it in defense only and not out of aggression.
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So far, it sounds like he only defends himself or his sister, which is very appropriate. You've educated him on proper use of force. Unless he proves otherwise, it doesn't sound like there's much concern here.
 
So far, it sounds like he only defends himself or his sister, which is very appropriate. You've educated him on proper use of force. Unless he proves otherwise, it doesn't sound like there's much concern here.
That seems to be the consensus among everyone I've been talking to. As long as he doesn't get carried away and start doing it to get his way, I think it'll be ok. I just don't want him to resort to beating the crap out of someone every time he gets mad, just because he knows he can. I went through a phase like that for a while, and it's no fun for anybody.

But he's an exceptionally smart kid, and he does seem to get it so far, so hopefully it won't become an issue. I've told him and my daughter since they were able to understand that if they are ever being physically hurt or physically threatened, they will not get in trouble for defending themselves.
 
I wouldn't worry too much about your son. My son is 11 and a lot like yours. Normally he's super sweet. He collects stuffed animals, he tells his momma he lovers her like 20 times a day...he's definitely in touch with his feminine side lol, but if someone messes with his sisters or little buddies it is on. He put a serious beat down on a kid a lot bigger than him last year that hit his big sister on the bus. He's also a beast on the soccer field and has been sent off in several games for being too physical. He's also not very big, but he's built like a **** brickhouse and strong as hell. My buddy has been trying to recruit him for his football team he coaches for 2 years, but he wants to stick with soccer.

The important thing is my kid never bullies or picks on anyone, and would never start a fight. He really doesn't even do anything if someone is picking on him. He just super defensive of his friends and family which I guess comes from being so sensitive. Sounds like your boy is the same way. I think it's an admirable quality.

My son is going to start taking marshall arts classes this winter. He took karate last year for a couple monthes. If you can get him in the right class it's great for kids like him.
 
walking away doesnt make you the bigger man it makes you the bigger target. I walked away once when I was in grade 10, my mother had just passed away, I had moved home to my dads and in a new school I didnt want to get in fights, long story short a bully picked a fight with me and I laughed and walked away, the next day 2 people picked fights with me again I walked away, and the following day 3 people did. at that point I had enough, so I walked up to the original bully, gave him a hellacious beatdown in front of about 80 people, got up, pissed on him, and then walked away. after that, I was pretty much left alone by all the so called tough guys. if I had just punched him out the first time I wouldnt have had to make an example out of him later.

the problem with todays kids are that parents either dont spend any time with them, or they coddle them, you get rotten little ****s who think they can do no wrong. as for a teenager, If I saw a teenager hitting my non teenage child, that kid would be getting a boot in the ass MINIMUM, and if I have to get a lawyer so be it.
 

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