The Redskins are My Girl :)

One of many experimental iterations ...

Jugband McGillicuddy

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Army Marshall


Being a Redskin fan is a lot like being with the right woman; or sometimes, the wrong one. They're definitely not a one-night stand though. Sometimes that's a good thing. Sometimes it's not. But the Skins are one of those women you keep, for better or worse, richer or poorer, and in the morning....with no makeup.

Let's break it down, Dr. Phil style.

First of all, the Redskins have brought me more utter joy, more pure ecstacy, more sheer unadulterated happiness than any other sports team possibly could. 70-chip, the 35-point second quarter, Mark Rypien's magical season, 14-13.

Likewise, there's a woman I once had in my life who brought me more ADULT-RATED happiness than any other woman possibly could. Unfortunately, since this is a family board, I can't provide examples. :)

But just like that woman, there have been plenty of times when the Skins let me down. Spurrier, Turner, Shuler, Deion, Haynesworth, (God help me) Gibbs II. Each of them left me in the typically-female position of asking, "Really? That's it? That's all?"

The Redskins have given me three beautiful, gleaming Lombardi trophies (There's a gleam, men! A GLEAM!); the greatest joy you can know as a football fan. That woman gave me the two most beautiful daughters I ever could have asked for; the greatest joy you can know as a human being.

There have been times, like any relationship, that I wanted to leave the Redskins. I threatened that I "wasn't going to watch next week's game." (In retrospect, that's kind of a feminine position to take too. Like I was gonna "withhold" my fandom. But like any good woman should, I gave in, and enjoyed a good, hard makeup game.)

There have been times too, that the Redskins probably wanted to leave me. As I've -- regretfully -- yelled at a woman who was trying her best, I've -- regretfully -- booed players on my own team who were doing the same.

Like any good relationship, the Redskins and I have experienced the full gamut of emotions together. We've fed off of each other at times (usually on 3rd down) and both been at our best. We've pulled together to overcome the loss of a family member. We celebrate our past together, and look forward to an even brighter future in the years to come.

The Redskins are my girl. They're not perfect. Some of 'em get PMS. They expect me to cook my own dinner. They don't like it when I'm watching football on TV on a Sunday afternoon, instead of spending time with them.

But just like that birthmark on the love of your life that no one else gets to see, there's something special about this team, this fanbase, that those on the outside will never understand. This team is mine, and unlike the woman I've described, it will be forever. I'm OK with both of those things.

When I wear a Redskins logo, it's not a fashion statement. It's a statement of commitment. Of dedication. Of love. I always make sure to wear Skins gear after a loss. Anyone can wear it after a win. (Just like anyone can wear their wedding ring when things are going well at home.)

I love this team, and I always will. And like the next woman who comes into my life, I hope, this year, they deserve me.

The end.
 

fansince62

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You lost me here HH...is this a lesbo relationship you are putting forward here as the model for Redskin fandom?......
 

Om

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Quite the angle, HH. Took cojones. :)

One thing I'll say about our girl over the past ten years ... she's been a little promiscuous and gotten a taste for expensive jewelry. Hopefully her new shrink/physical trainer has finally cleared her head of such nonsense so we can get back to showing up for work Monday mornings looking like we haven't slept a wink but smiling.

Oh, and don't mind fansince--he's been like that since his feminine side banished him to the couch in 1993. :cool:
 

fansince62

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well...just remember...given the way the court system works...you divorce this woman one of two things will happen:

- she gets all your money

- the lawyers get all your money

either way....leaving her has a high cost..... :) ......
 

the Omniscient

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Your girl is cheating on you! I have her at my house right now and she is smothered all over my walls, floors, television, and even the dashboard of my pick-up truck. I cannot get her out of my mind and I hear that there are millions of other men and women that cannot either.

So do yourself a favor and get checked. I did and I must say, I will suffer with her some more.
 

Burgundy Burner

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Virginia

Is this like an out of body experience?

I try not to over-analyze my fandom. I'm a fan. That will never change. Passionate about it? Yes. Analytical? Nah. It's like Norm says - Boy meets beer, boy drinks beer. I don't drink beer, but I love Redskins. End of story.
 

SilentThreat

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Hog... i have a confession to make my good friend... you're crazy lil redneck fan here has been having an affair with your girl for over 20 years now... i'm sorry it had to come out like this in public.. but that girl we've apparently been sharing.... that $%&*$ is crazy!!!!
 

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