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  1. #1
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    Default My Mom Got Arrested, Need A Question Answered

    My mom found a roommate on craigslist earlier this month, against the advice of everybody. It was a guy and his girlfriend renting out a room in their townhouse. My mom moved in on November 9th, paid her first month up front, then quickly learned it was a bad situation.

    The guy constantly beat up his girlfriend, but she never reported him. They broke up, and the girlfriend moved out. Since this guy had no job, he had no money coming in, and got another roommate and asked my mom to pay him the next month's rent early, because he had blown most of the rent money and didn't want to get evicted. She refused, as anyone would, and his response to her was that if she didn't pay up, he would make life hell for her and everyone she knew. She blew it off as nothing until last night when the police showed up and arrested her.

    Since it is only a few miles up the street from me, I drove over there with my wife to get my mom's dog and valuables. I talked to the police officers while I was there, and they said he had filed a charge against my mom claiming that she had threatened to have me beat his ass (which never happened since I have never once met the guy and didn't know the whole situation until last night, and never even went to the place to begin with) and that she herself made threats to him. He filed an emergency protective order against her and wrote on the complaint that he feared for his life, so they had to arrest her.

    She spent roughly 4 hours getting processed and stuff, and was released around midnight. They told her that she could go back home, but not to even say anything to him or she would be in violation of the EPO. So she had me on the phone when she went home, and the guy wasn't even there. She went straight to bed, then left at 5 this morning to go to work.

    A few minutes ago, she called me from work freaking out, because the new roommate had called her and said that the guy was on his way to the magistrate again. When she asked why, he said that the guy was ranting and raving about how he couldn't believe they let her come back, and he was going to the magistrate to claim that she violated the EPO to get her arrested again. That would piss me off enough, but then he also said the guy mentioned me by name and said he was gonna file one against me too.

    Now again, I have been there one time in my life. It was last night with two police officers. I didn't even know the guy's name until the police officers mentioned it. How he got my name is anyone's guess, but I am about ready to go postal over this BS, because I have a perfect record, I was a Correction's Officer, and I have never done anything wrong. I don't even know the guy, and I'm pissed that this asshole is trying to drag me into this garbage just because he is pissed at my mom. I have nothing to do with the situation, and I swear I might lose it if he somehow does manage to get me arrested for something that doesn't involve me in any way.

    As the officers stated last night, the laws are ****ed up enough to allow this idiot to make BS claims every day if he wants to, and they would have to arrest whoever he names each time, whether they did anything or not.

    I guess my question is can he really file something against me without any evidence of contact at all, that would actually result in me getting arrested like my mom did? I know it sounds far fetched that it could happen, but it happened to my mom, and she was avoiding him like the plague.

    After some digging, I discovered he recently started a new job. He's a head chef at a new restaurant here, and making almost $20 an hour. He also has a history of health code violations at other establishments oddly enough. Looks like me and some friends are about to spend the next few days finding things in our food.

    Since he won't have income, he will not be able to pay the rent in 9 days. He is over 2 months behind already, and was informed by the landlord that 9 days from now is it. No money, no home. I got the landlord's info from my mom, and turns out he's my buddy's stepdad. I called him up and filled him in, and he said he already has the order from the judge to evict on the 25th. He was gonna give the guy a chance to come up with the money, but now that he knows he won't be able to, he already started writing up a new lease for my mom and the other roommate to take over as the new tenants on the following day.

    You don't **** with my family, period. You also don't drag my name into something I have nothing to do with. It's amazing how karma always seems to have a way of leveling the playing field and working everything out
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  2. #2
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    If he's single an making $20 per hour, how could he possibly be so far behind in paying rent on an apartment ? Must blow it on drugs, based on his behavior.
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  3. #3
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    Quote Originally Posted by Fear The Spear View Post
    If he's single an making $20 per hour, how could he possibly be so far behind in paying rent on an apartment ? Must blow it on drugs, based on his behavior.
    As erratic as my mom says he acts, it has to be drugs. She said he's thin but sweats profusely almost all the time, he has violent outbursts on a regular basis, he stays up until daybreak nearly every day, he's always broke, he never eats, and she says he's very jumpy and on edge constantly. She said when he does eat, it's almost always dessert items, and he's constantly picking at his skin.

    I have had friends over the years that were addicted to meth, and he seems to act like every single one of them did. I'm not one to jump to conclusions based on circumstance, but all the pieces fit.

    And this is a pattern for him. He's been evicted for non payment from every place he's ever lived, and he has never owned a car. What 30+ year old living on their own has never owned a car?
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  4. #4
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    You do have an interesting life
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    Formerly known as ...............Sarge

  5. #5
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    I went through a similar situation about 10 yrs ago with an ex-girlfriend that i kicked out, except it was 10 times worse if you can imagine that. She ended up filling 4 different charges against me. I never got arrested or convicted of anything, they just served me with a warrant each time. I didn't have anything on my record, so that might be why they never arrested me.

    Anyway, yea someone can basically file as many bogus charges against you as they want as far as i know. While i was in court over the 3rd charge that got dismissed i asked the judge point blank how long are they going to let her keep on doing this. He never did answer me. I don't know if it was because there were other people in there waiting for their case or not. I also brought it up to the cops each time i answered these warrants and basically got the same answer as you did. At the 4th court hearing about the 4th charge, that got dismissed also, he said i could go and kept her in there. I don't know what ever happened, if anything(never seen or heard from her since), but he was noticeabley pissed at her from the very get go and up until the time i left.

    Anyhow, i think the only thing you can do is file a civil charge.
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  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sarge View Post
    You do have an interesting life
    I tell people this all the time. My friends always tell me there's no way someone would believe my life story if they weren't witnessing it for themselves. It's like a bad B movie

    Quote Originally Posted by Go Deep View Post
    I went through a similar situation about 10 yrs ago with an ex-girlfriend that i kicked out, except it was 10 times worse if you can imagine that. She ended up filling 4 different charges against me. I never got arrested or convicted of anything, they just served me with a warrant each time. I didn't have anything on my record, so that might be why they never arrested me.
    I can imagine it being worse. my friends that lived a few houses down were going through a divorce 2 years ago, and went through the same thing. They filed a bull**** charge against each other every single night for almost 30 days straight, just to piss each other off. Neither was doing anything wrong, they just kept doing it to each other for dickish reasons.

    Eventually, they went before a judge and both had to spend 10 days in jail to "get it out of their system." They got the hint after that.

    Quote Originally Posted by Go Deep View Post
    Anyway, yea someone can basically file as many bogus charges against you as they want as far as i know. While i was in court over the 3rd charge that got dismissed i asked the judge point blank how long are they going to let her keep on doing this. He never did answer me. I don't know if it was because there were other people in there waiting for their case or not. I also brought it up to the cops each time i answered these warrants and basically got the same answer as you did. At the 4th court hearing about the 4th charge, that got dismissed also, he said i could go and kept her in there. I don't know what ever happened, if anything(never seen or heard from her since), but he was noticeabley pissed at her from the very get go and up until the time i left.

    Anyhow, i think the only thing you can do is file a civil charge.
    It's ridiculous. You talk about a loophole in desperate need of being closed. I think after two consecutive dismissals, they should file charges against the person making the accusations. This is just another example of how flawed our system really is.

    The worst part is, I've been a witness to someone threatening to kill somebody, and the cops said they couldn't do anything about it without witnessing it for themselves. I wonder what determines who gets arrested for it and who doesn't. If it's up to the discretion of the magistrate, they should all adhere to the same things when making their decision. It shouldn't be a pick and choose situation, it should be definitive one way or the other.
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  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by Extreme View Post
    It's ridiculous. You talk about a loophole in desperate need of being closed. I think after two consecutive dismissals, they should file charges against the person making the accusations. This is just another example of how flawed our system really is.
    Well, i'm not so sure there isn't some mechanism to deal with this. In my situation she may have got fined or do jail time, i don't know.

    I think she was able to get away with this for a couple of reasons. First, she filed all these charges within a month. So, i didn't appear in court for the 1st charge until she had already filled all four. So they may have not had anything on record. Second, i got a different judge each time.

    Thinking back the one thing i didn't do was mention something till the 3rd case. The second time i went to court she claimed that i beat her. Well, i was so embarassed and mad and i couldn't think straight. I don't think i've ever been so emotionally warped in my life. The last thing was i didn't get a lawyer. These claims was so ridiculous, except for the assualt charge, i didn't think i would need one. It was probably stupid of me not to get a lawyer about the assault charge, but she hadn't been living with me for 2 weeks before she filed this and the judge questioned her about that and asked why she didn't report it sooner and if she had any marks or evidence, and ofcourse she didn't.
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  8. #8
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    This is really an odd case. Usually the laws and arrests favor the female whenever there is a conflict between a male and female.
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  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by Fear The Spear View Post
    This is really an odd case. Usually the laws and arrests favor the female whenever there is a conflict between a male and female.
    You would think so. Especially when he's a 6'4" 250+lb 31 year old man, and my mom is 4'11", 110 lbs and 57 years old. At some point, you'd think the magistrate could call bull**** on his claim of my mom making him feel like his life is in danger.

    Oh, and I found it very odd that on the complaint he filled out, he listed my mom as 5'10" and 200 lbs If you could ever see my mom, you would understand the extreme hilarity of that claim. Nobody can be that horrible at estimation. I think he did that to make her look like a big mean bitch.
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  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by Extreme View Post
    Oh, and I found it very odd that on the complaint he filled out, he listed my mom as 5'10" and 200 lbs If you could ever see my mom, you would understand the extreme hilarity of that claim. Nobody can be that horrible at estimation. I think he did that to make her look like a big mean bitch.
    Didn't the police happen to get a glance at her approximate height and weight, when they arrested her ? And how about the judge ?
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  11. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by Fear The Spear View Post
    Didn't the police happen to get a glance at her approximate height and weight, when they arrested her ? And how about the judge ?
    Yeah, they noticed how off it was, but their job is to do what the warrant says. She doesn't see the judge until December 13th.
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  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by Extreme View Post
    Yeah, they noticed how off it was, but their job is to do what the warrant says. She doesn't see the judge until December 13th.
    I'm guessing with new evidence introduced on December 13th, there should be a reversal on both sides. Charges against her dropped, and new charges against him for filing a false police report.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Fear The Spear View Post
    I'm guessing with new evidence introduced on December 13th, there should be a reversal on both sides. Charges against her dropped, and new charges against him for filing a false police report.
    I could see this happening. She also could sue him though given his economic condition and psychological state I wouldn't. However, it might be useful to have her sign out a protective order against him. She certainly has a right to be wary of who and what this guy is and maybe it will prove a warning to him. Then again, if he gets arrested it might set him off even further.
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    Quote Originally Posted by burgold View Post
    I could see this happening. She also could sue him though given his economic condition and psychological state I wouldn't. However, it might be useful to have her sign out a protective order against him. She certainly has a right to be wary of who and what this guy is and maybe it will prove a warning to him. Then again, if he gets arrested it might set him off even further.
    Yea, if I were in her shoes I might consider dropping any charges against him, due to fear of his horrible mental instability and what he might do, and just let it go for the sake of the safety of me and my family.
    How people that are that crazy are able to hold onto good jobs amazes me, while so many good, decent people can't seem to get, or hang onto one.
    Last edited by Fear The Spear; 11-17-11 at 05:34 PM.
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