A Burgundy and Gold Obsession
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  1. #1
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    Army

    Default Ever had an epic comeback for someone?

    You may or may not agree with me that my experience a little while ago was epic. I have the unique ability that most people lack - quick thinking. I don't mean in general or all the time, but when it comes to needing a snappy comeback, or having something laid out on a silver platter waiting for a punchline, I tend to be on it immediately like nobody's business.

    Just a little while ago, my wife got home with the kids and we went to get some milk. On the way home, we are sitting at the red light when some jackwad in a Lambo pulls up next to us.

    Here I sit, in my 2003 Mercury Sable. I am driving, my wife is next to me, and our two kids are in the back. This idiot pulls up next to me revving his engine and inching forward like he wants to race. The whole time, he is staring me down. Seriously? What would it prove to this douchebag in a car that can outrace nearly any car on the planet, to beat my granny car?

    So the light is still red, he keeps revving and staring, and starts honking to get my attention. I tell the kids to cover their ears, then I roll down the window and say, "I have a 14 inch dick." The smirk vanishes off of his face immediately, and while he is stunned, the light turns green and I burn him off the line (my car isn't the slouch it appears to be fro the outside - it has a 24 valve DOHC 6 cylinder engine with a turbocharger from the original owner). His delayed reaction is my gain, as I had roughly one block to travel

    In all honesty though, you've probably guessed I don't really have a 14 inch meat wagon (I'd have to let it go limp and fold it in half for that ), but that wasn't the point. It gave him something to think about, and it gave me the hesitation I needed to embarrass him in my granny mobile . Today, I feel like a winner.

    Please share your stories, I know you have em.
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    It's ok, I don't like you either.

  2. #2
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    Florida State

    Default

    I'm a dim wit...
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  3. #3

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    Marine Corps Virginia

    Default

    [video]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0KmTTy_MM5w[/video]
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    Subscribe to our BGO Mailing List

    You ain't bonafide

  4. #4

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    Indiana

    Default

    I usually can come up with devastating comebacks.

    Problem is, most of them are the next day.
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    I'm giving it a 2-4 year window. Looking for improvement in all areas. Redskins, you're on the clock.

  5. #5
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    Default

    interesting story
    Last edited by Dreamingwolf; 04-26-11 at 05:35 AM.
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  6. #6
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    Army

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by servumtuum View Post
    I usually can come up with devastating comebacks.

    Problem is, most of them are the next day.
    Feel lucky that it' that soon, my mom used to always think of great comebacks weeks later
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    It's ok, I don't like you either.

  7. #7

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    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Extreme View Post
    You may or may not agree with me that my experience a little while ago was epic.
    Not even close.

    But hey, you liked it. That's all that matters.
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    "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and **** the prom queen"

  8. #8
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    Army

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Ax View Post
    Not even close.

    But hey, you liked it. That's all that matters.
    Guess you had to be there.
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    It's ok, I don't like you either.

  9. #9

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    Default

    Reminds me of one time I was working for a newspaper in the production department and I was having a slow day so I wandered out onto the sales floor to see how things were going for the sales reps. So I'm looking at the sales board with one of the reps and Doug walks up. Doug's a rep too, and he's kinda the office cut-up. Always has a good one-liner ready. I like to give it back to him from time to time so I look at his numbers and say to the other guy 'looks like Doug's having a slow week this week.'

    Without missing a beat Doug says 'looks like Henry has his head up his ass again.'

    That was about ten years ago, and I'm still trying to come up with a good response.
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  10. #10
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    Default

    Henry why didnt you just say "why are you looking at my ass"
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  11. #11

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    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Dreamingwolf View Post
    Henry why didnt you just say "why are you looking at my ass"
    Finally!

    I have to go make a phone call.
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  12. #12
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    Default

    What's funny about this story is that I can remember doing exactly the same thing, some 30 years ago!
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    Why should I get out of bed at 4am just to watch us lose?

  13. #13
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    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by SkinnedAussie View Post
    What's funny about this story is that I can remember doing exactly the same thing, some 30 years ago!
    Great minds think alike
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    It's ok, I don't like you either.

 

 

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