A Burgundy and Gold Obsession
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Blognostications

2014 - Week 11 Redskins v Buccaneers

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Blognosticator - fansince62

Stirring the Pot

I see that new recipes, favorite meals and such enjoy frequent attention over in the Five O’Clock Club. Well, alright then, time to stir the pot.

But first, an effort at meeting my appointed task.

I don’t care about the Tampa Bay Buccaneers. They’re 1-8. Talk about a contest hurtling at us with all the drama and promise of two Titans meeting on the field of battle! Mano a Mano. The Will to Power glorified in Roger Goodell sanctioned combat. Real men with colorful superman socks and pockets lined with deodorant advertising dollars facing off to the bitter end. Players analyzing every behavioral tipper until their LCDs and plasma displays melt in revolt against uncompensated over-time. Coaches sleeping at Redskins Park; scheming until the wee hours of the morning new moves for their player chess pieces (pawns or knights?). Wives, mistresses and concubines stoically braving the empty lair and cooling hearth as their burgundy and gold warriors mount their Mercedes and Beamers and motor for distant FEDEX fields!

Not.

We’re playing a team that has already begun auctioning off its players to create capital for the can’t arrive too soon off-season. They don’t have a QB. They can’t stop anyone. They can’t score on anyone. Yup. That pretty much summarizes it. Fortunate thing that a substantial portion of our current brain trust hails from that standard for modern day success!!!!

So I expect a close game.

Visit their team web site and you’ll have to concede their cheerleaders aren’t half bad. If I were just a bit younger. Ooops, a digression into tangents with greater potential for immediate returns on emotional investment. Looking for positives where they present themselves. All one can do during this sorry rear quadrant of a season.

And what about BGO? Well. Let’s see. In no order of priority or allegiance to accuracy:

- McD5 still loves Coach G (his G spot as it were), but is searching for targets of blame as the team lives down to minimum expectations. Then again….aren’t we all?

- Bulldog continues his staccato literary style, each liner note nevertheless reinforcing a single meme: we aint got the talent on either line. It appears there is consensus among luminaries such as Elephant, Rymanofthenorth, DieselPower44 and other critic savants that indeed we are in for a rebuild of some magnitude.

- Others heroically confront the facts and history with unwavering commitment to optimistic outcomes. I believe it’s easily explained as a search for reasons to imbibe rather than some deeper quest for meaning. Big Mike, GSF, heck even a thread where the homeless had to nevertheless post positive thoughts about our championship empty cart maneuvered many of us back to center-line. BGO, if nothing else, is the exemplar for diversity!

- And TR1?!! Well, let’s just say the Big Guy, call sign Redskin One, the Red Zebra himself, alias Johnny Rocket, has hired a Pinkertons team to man a 24 by 7 human shield. This poses some philosophic quandaries (collateral damage) but we’re keeping an eye on TR1 hoping we aren’t admiring his visage in local post offices any time soon.

- Ax me who is craziest around here and you already know the response. But damn it, anyone who can make me laugh during this never ending test of endurance and patience deserves hosannas. He called the cowturd game. My bet is he thinks we’ll crush the Bucs. You got it bubba. Buc them Tampa Bay imbreds!

- Then there are the statistically minded. I don’t know what imaginary island Mics113 and Gulf Coast Skin have elected to vacation on. Fellas, we’re 3 and 6. The proud follow-up to 3 and 13! I call that a definite indicator of difficulty. There are no silver linings. Just dark clouds. Stats, at this point, aren’t going to tame the beast in most of us. Don’t misinterpret the incivility - I do respect the thought and effort. Just not in the mood at this point to argue the nuances. I want stats on how many players Gruden calls into his office and threatens to kick their arses if performance doesn’t improve.

- Burgundy Burner, by the way, can do no wrong in my book. He’s personally responsible for each of my 10,000 likes. So drop any pretense or wonder about whether or not our resident roster specialist will receive any errant arrows. Not gonna happen on my watch.

- Servumtuum? What the heck is that? Are you a waiter or a tennis player? Or an emissary of the court? Anywho, what are our counter-parts thinking this week? McGown a better QB than RGIII? Thank God Colt isn’t starting? Their defense can stop our o-line cold? Morons. They should move to Minnesota. Or not.

I know I missed many of you. Trust me…I think about each and everyone of you as I read each nimble post and think: how do they do it? How do they sustain themselves through all this unrelenting mediocrity? The only answer that leaps to mind is that you all banded together and moved to Colorado or Oregon.

We do all hold one thing in common. When the Skins win (or have a bye week) the ensuing week is a lot more pleasant. For that reason alone we need to beat the lowly Bucs. Without mercy.
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