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Cake or Death?

Dazed & Confused

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I keep thinking about the game yesterday, and can't help but feeling confused. After the week one win against Dallas, there were a few certainties:

1) Our run defense was going to be a weak spot this year. Our pass defense looked all right however, and our D overall looked very strong.

2) Our O, on the other hand? Yikes. Dumpster fire-bad. Not able to move the ball, needing to rely on our D to score touchdowns.

Yes. Well. Looks like I picked the wrong week to... well, pick your favorite ending to that line.

So, um, yeah. Looks like everything is reversed now? Hence the Dazed and Confused title. Which got me thinking about Zeppelin, one of my favorite bands since I was 13. And I thought I would hand out awards named for Zeppelin songs to participants in yesterday's game.

(Yes, there is a good chance this will suck, and if it does, we will never mention it again. Understood? Good, good)

[I][B]All My Love[/B][/I] award to Donovan McNabb. Of all the bright spots yesterday, he was by far the brightest. I wrote in the chat room yesterday that I felt confident when we had the ball in OT. Still do. McNabb was brilliant during the game, buying time with his feet, hitting open receivers, and just generally leading our team. Made all the sweeter by the QB controversy in Philly right now between Vick and Kolb. If we can get 2-4 years of McNabb, this will go down as one of the best trades in franchise history.

[I][B]Babe, I'm Gonna Leave You[/B][/I] award to Larry Johnson. Seriously? This guy beat out Ryan Torain and Willie Parker? Really? Time to cut our loses and bring in someone hungrier and smarter. That 10 yard loss was atrocious. Bring the hammer, Shanny!

[I][B]Celebration Day[/B][/I] award to Joey Galloway, for getting that wide open in overtime, only to be followed by...

[I][B]Gallows Pole[/B][/I] award to Joey Galloway, for dropping the pass. McNabb took heat from the announcers, but that looked to me to be on Galloway. He got open, McNabb hit him almost in stride, and... he dropped it? That was the game, folks.

[B][I]Dancing Days[/I][/B] for Cooley's TD. I had just been thinking McNabb hadn't targeted Cooley in while when he gets open on a beautiful crossing pattern and scores easily. Great route, great pass, great play. Thought we were gonna win on this one after that play.

[B][I]Good Times, Bad Times[/I][/B] award for the whole game. Self explanatory. Sadly, the Bad Times won out.

[I][B]Hats Off to (Roy) Harper[/B][/I] award for Carlos Rogers. Yeah, I know it woulda been cooler if his last name was Harper, but what are you gonna do? Anyway, Carlos caught an INT (thank you, Henry!)! I know I'm not the only one who saw him juggle it for a second and thought for sure he would drop it. I had so much fly through my head so quickly, mainly thinking that this was the same old Carlos. When he hung onto the ball to make the play, I rewound twice to make sure I had seen correctly. Anyway, hats off to you, Carlos! Now do it some more.

[B][I]Heartbreaker[/I][/B] award for... let's just move on.

[B][I](Hey) Hey, Hey What Can I Do?[/I][/B] award for Albert Haynesworth. Did you see what I did there? Well for starters Al, you could learn the schemes, and oh, I don't know, actually play? I do not know how much difference Fat Al would have made yesterday, but considering how much we have paid him and are paying him this year, I would like to think he would have made a difference. Thinking to his uninspired play in the Preseason and Week One however, maybe not.

[B][I]How Many More Times must we suffer this bush league icing call[/I][/B] award for Gary Kubiak (wow, long song title for Zeppelin. That's odd. Didn't remember that one till I looked on my iPod. Weird.). Come on already. Just because you didn't trust Rackers to kick a long FG doesn't mean you should act like a child, coach. The great fear for me is that made kick, and subsequent missed kick affects Gano, who looks like the real deal. His kickoffs are awesome, he's money from 40-50, and I think that kick to win the game could have solidified him as a stud. I hope Kubiak's BS doesn't get to his head.

[I][B]In My Time of Dying[/B][/I] award... seriously? WTH is it with these depressing song titles? Really? I'm ready to go drink my cares away and it's 2pm. Maybe I need to do this with Alice in Chains next time.

[I][B]The Rover[/B][/I] award to LaRon Landry who played out of his mind. Who knew that by blitzing him and keeping him near the line of scrimmage, you could accentuate his strengths and hide his weaknesses? Not Greg Blache, that's who!

[I][B]Nobody's Fault but Mine/Since I've Been Loving You[/B][/I] award to Reed Doughty. HH, go read something else for a minute, will ya? Reed, we all love you, but that was painful. I know, the coaching staff didn't have much of a choice, but that was still painful. Where is Chris Horton? Anyone remember him? Does he suck that bad suddenly?

[I][B]South Bound Suarez[/B][/I] award to Clinton Portis for his blocking on the Sleepy play. Lots has been said about this already, so I will sum up with, "Wow". I know, master wordsmith here. Om, I'm not. :)

[B][I]When the Levee Breaks/Whole Lotta Love/You're Time is Gonna Come[/I][/B] award to the Redskins. When, not if, but when our offense and defense start playing well at the same time? I just hope it's when we're playing the Eagles. You know, for Donovan's sake.

[B][I]Thank You[/I][/B] award to Mike Shanahan. Coach, I love you and hate you at the same time, but mostly love. I am buying in. I know we will have to fight, scratch and clay to get the playoffs this year, but beyond? The Washington Redskins are looking like they belong in the NFL. No one loved Papa Gibbs more than me (I know everyone says that, but I'm serious. No, really. Stop arguing, you will lose), but for the first time since I can remember back to the very early 90's, the Skins are disciplined. We're going to be in almost every game we play. We won't them all, but we will have a chance. And that is why Snyder brought in Shanahan.

Bonus points if you can figure out my favorite LZ song, which is on this list. Umm, now that I think about it, if you figure it out, you should enter into the palm reading business, cause I left no clues. Good luck with that!

Well, that was somewhat cathartic. I feel a little better now, and hope you do too. Next week brings the Rams with a rookie QB. Should be better, no?

Updated 09-20-10 at 02:16 PM by Goaldeje

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